Going Bridal
Bridezilla Confession Booth
bridal sins confessed

Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion
bad photos & bad dresses

don't let your guests stiff you!

Wedding Planner (evil)
deeply bitter, but funny

Bridezilla Shop
Anti-bride Gear

Shut Up, Bridezilla ecard
say it electronically

shut up about your fucking wedding
The Anti-Bride Store
t-shirts starting at $12.99
greedy bride
Greedy Bride Store

wedding shoes

Martha Stuart's Excruciatingly Perfect Weddings
Best. Parody. Ever.





Saturday, July 13, 2002

Sara: Yeeehaw, get along little bridies

Ryan and I are going to Bridal Barn (aka that big chain bridal store) today - photos to come. We're playing a game where I get to find the worst bridesmaid dress in the store, and she has to try it on for photos, and she gets to find the worst wedding dress in the store for me to try on. Heh. It's also about seeing what our Plan B options are if I decide that making ALL of the dresses for the wedding is too much. I'm having an unusual burst of sense about this, so I want to get an idea of what is out there for Ryan and my jr. bridesmaid if I'm not going to be able to make their dresses. But, really, it's about seeing the bad dresses and watching the bridal party herds move through the racks loudly debating the merits of strapless vs. spaghetti straps. Estrogen overload, away!

Going Bridal is in USA Today - is it just me or is this getting out of hand?
link | Comments []

[back to top]

Friday, July 12, 2002

Sara: For your CD collection

Hookslide: Original Spin

recent review on CD Baby:
Fans and followers of Rockapella, N-Sync and George Clinton will want to stop, drop and roll upon hearing this fiery, flaming, back draft of bombastic men's pop a capella. This is the type that will send your jaw to the linoleum with record-breaking velocity as you gawk at the huge sound entirely done by voice, percussion included. With harmonies tighter than your Aunt Gertrudes' girdle, the plentiful hooks spilling over this waistline are worth shakin'.
link | Comments []

[back to top]

Thursday, July 11, 2002

Sara: Make it so

Star Trek Weddings in Vegas

Because it isn't a real wedding without a tribble.

More theme weddings in Vegas - y'know, if I had to pick, I think I'd do the EFX at the MGM:

Dreams will come true when the bride and groom hold their wedding ceremony on the actual set of "EFX Alive." Merlin presides as the minister. Trees and flowers will blossom as the couple is united on stage with nymphs and sprites guiding their way. But before the happy couple can say "I Do," the minister will have to fight off the objections of a fire-breathing dragon.

Sigh. Dragons never want anyone to be happy. Wait a minute...nymphs and sprites? There is someone in the world whose actual paying job is to be Nymph #2 in the wedding production at the MGM in Vegas? Wow. I missed that booth on career day.
link | Comments []

Dennis: The chrome & neon hell of Entertainment Tonight

Every now & again I give into the impulse to watch ET (and not the flick that maims a rather thoughtful novel by William Kotzwinkle, the author of one of my all time favorite books The Bear Went over the Mountain). I always feel dirty after giving into my curiosity about celebrity culture. Last night was no different. There was a great deal of wedding/marriage reporting which just made me scratch my head. Already knew that famous people, especially those most famous for being famous, are the annointed royalty of the US but I hadn't realized how bad it'd gotten. When did the media start hanging on every tedious detail of these people's relations ?

Why in God's name would anyone outside of their families care if Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen were on the road to divorce ? If you couldn't see the end coming for a touring party band musician and the star of Touched By An Angel then someone needs to send you a copy of the game Clue. And fast.

Then the next item up was the pending nuptials for Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro (former Chili Pepper & Jane's Addiction axe man). She's all abuzz about the super secret ceremony. Wait, how secret can it be if you're blabbing about it on an internationally broadcast fluff factory like ET ? I got the sense the groom would be wearing a sleeveless tux to show off his wicked tattoos. Like I say, you can take the trash out of the trailer park but you can't take the trailer park out of the trash.

Speaking of International, during what amounted to a commercial for Paramount's comedy back catalog the anchor person used the word "Supernational" to describe Paul Hogan ("Hey mate, what about my career?" - David Spade on Crocodile Dundee). My guess was it's a bastardization of 'superstar' and 'international', a blow to the English language on par with spelling cheese with a Z and no final E.

The last bit that warrants mention is Julia Roberts "bohemian wedding gown" that they hyped the whole episode and then tossed out a 30 second blurb about as the closing credits hit. It was pink and oddly cut and utterly unappealing on nearly any human being besides Julia who I guess pulled it off. The gist of the newslet was this "hip, youngish gown" would be available soon for brides-to-be from ABS by Alan Schwartz. It honestly made me gag to hear this. Besides the evil Julia unleashed on the psyche of women everywhere with Pretty Woman (well written but ultimately a big step backwards for feminism if you ask me) now gals can dress up like her. Human beings shouldn't try to pattern themselves after a Barbie doll. Maybe it isn't her fault but maybe it is. She still participates in sharing this experience with the world or at least allows her handlers to carefully present the blessed event to us peons. She lives a fantasy life fueled by stupid money and a child's impulsiveness. She's shaping up to give Liz Taylor a run on engagements if not actual marriages. And that's not the most hopeful image to use for anyone else's marriage prospects.

I know I'm usually more sunshine and chocolates than this but the whole episode bugged me big time and made me understand why many folks hate weddings. When the new media aristocracy are the model we set for society then no wonder weddings have gotten all wrapped up in money and pomp. What a load ! Some mighty screwy ideas are being sold to us and I encourage all concerned to say I'm not buying. Not anymore.

I'll take something special with my someone special that vibrates on a quieter, more meaningful level any old day.
link | Comments []

[back to top]

Wednesday, July 10, 2002

Sara: Muppet Babies Get Lost at the State Fair

Dennis' review of a Jacob Fred Jazz Odyssey show has just been published at jambase.com.
link | Comments []

Sara: What I really should have gotten Ryan as a wedding gift

Description: In this secluded garden, this lovely bride reflects on her wedding vows. This serene bridal image is inspired by Thomas Kinkade, the Painter of Light. His beloved garden scene serves as the perfect setting for this lavishly costumed porcelain bride by Sandra Bilotto. The doll measures 10 1/2" tall and the arched backdrop measures 14 1/2" tall and has a wooden base. $128.99

It's a match made in QVC heaven. Kinkade stuff AND dolls! Imagine the crossover opportunities! I love kitsch, but this frightens even me.

Ryan and I met and bonded when we were both working for the company that used to do the Thomas Kinkade web site. I don't know if we would have discovered each other's evil streak if we'd been doing web sites for something normal, but having to upload yet another painting of a gazebo, with its accompanying treacly text, every other week really brought out the snarkiness. Our weekend coding marathons with MST3K tapes on the tv between our cubes were fun times.
link | Comments []

[back to top]

Tuesday, July 09, 2002

Sara: Yahoo!

Yahoo! Picks
I'm a pick? Golly. I'm not as cool as catboxing.

link | Comments []

Sara: The amateurs of beautiful breeches will seek by there.

I just love online translation. So, here's a mention of my site en francais:

Bridal Blogs... Des Mariages de Geeks ? Dans 300 jours Sarah & Dennis are getting married... 3 liens suprenants sur les weblogs de mariage recensÚs par le Sydney Morning Herald. A ne pas rater : Le blog du corset (sewgeeky). Les amateurs de belles culottes chercheront par lÓ.

and here is what Google thinks it says:
Bridal Blogs... Marriages of Geeks? In 300 days Sarah & Dennis are getting married... 3 bonds suprenants on the weblogs of marriage listed by Sydney Morning Herald. With not missing: The blog of the corset (sewgeeky). The amateurs of beautiful breeches will seek by there.

Must be referring to my entirely surprising mention in the Sydney Morning Herald last week.

I'm such a dork. I shouldn't be so amused by this, but I am.

And I am oh-so-amused by this: Worst Bridesmaid Dresses Ever - click on the Slideshow link. I'm thinking that Ryan would look great in the grand prize winner, the pink foil pup tent, but only if she also does MTV hair.
link | Comments []

[back to top]

Monday, July 08, 2002

Sara: Monday!

Something I forgot to mention yesterday - Dennis borrowed my car before I woke up and got it washed and vacuumed and cleared out the general debris in the back seat. He's so fabulous. My car was a mess, and he didn't say a word about that. He just did it because he knew it was bugging me, so I would have one less thing on my plate this week. It's humbling to be so loved sometimes.

Up until now, there hasn't been anything I've disliked about working at St. T's. Now, there is. I'm the first person anyone sees when they walk into the church office, and sometimes, well, they're looking for some help, money or food or something basic. Which I can't give them; we support a lot of outreach and agencies as a parish, but we don't give out money from the front desk. It's not a good use of our limited outreach money, and it turns the administrative office into something it isn't. All of which makes a lot of sense until I have someone in front of me looking for some help and I have to tell them no. I can give them a brochure which lists agencies in Silicon Valley that can help them (although I usually hear that they've been there and didn't get help, which may or may not be true), but that's all I'm able to do. It's a horrible feeling. I need to come up with a strategy for dealing with this. I would happily set aside $10 or so a week and tuck it in my desk and give it to people who come in, or keep some extra food on hand, but I understand why it's a bad idea on a larger level, that I cannot run my own little charity here at my desk. It would create problems for my co-workers when I'm not around. Is there a way to say No with compassion? What can I offer when I can't give them anything?

Dennis and I give money to people on the street all the time; he likes to give 'real money' - $5 or so, enough to get an actual meal. I'm more of the spare change or a dollar sort; further proof that the boy lives with a much more open hand than I do. We noticed something interesting the other day - when we buy stuff for ourselves, we often end up regretting it or feeling stupid for giving in to a momentary impulse, and we wish we had the money back. However, we've never experienced that same twinge after, say, throwing a generous tip in the jar at the coffee place, or picking up someone's toll on the Bay Bridge, or giving $5 to a homeless person. That money is never begrudged. Huh.
link | Comments []

[back to top]

Sunday, July 07, 2002

Sara: Embroidery Machine Smackdown

I'm trying to work on the corset tonight. It is not going well. Actually, the part that involves sewing beads onto the embroidery I already did is going well. The part that involves doing more embroidery - not so well. Stupid thread keeps shredding. And, to make matters worse, I may have found an embroidery thread color that I like a little bit better than the bright gold I was using before. I'm going to keep using the bright gold for the corset, but I may change over to this more-subtle gold for the dress. Or maybe not. I'll know more once I get the corset done, I think. I've been putting gold sequins and seed beads on the gold embroidery and it does look quite fabulous. Check the sewing journal if you want to know more.

Overall, a good weekend. Had a nice evening with Dennis on Friday, then on Saturday went to a work party at a friend's new condo (I did a masterful job of cleaning the bathroom, if I do say so myself) which was kind of like that barn-raising idea that Dennis mentioned, and then we went to a great party at his friend Sheila's house. Her place is so cute, and they had put a lot of effort into the food, which I was more than happy to help eat. I had a really good time, and was well-behaved enough not to steal any of the decorative accessories, although I wanted to.

Today was, um, less great. I woke up on the wrong side of my bed of nails and never fully slipped out of it. Poor poor Dennis. Through a series of misadventures, I wound up going to Grace Cathedral in San Francisco this morning for services. I mean, I have three churches in my life that would have been logical places to be this morning, and I found myself driving to the cathedral. Whatever. It was where I needed to be. I hope the rest of the people there didn't mind too much that the sermon was directed at me today. I appreciated the anonymity; I slipped over to the side chapel for anointing, and spent a good chunk of time in the labyrinth as well. Dennis has gently suggested that perhaps I make this God stuff more difficult than it needs to be sometimes. He may be right.

And then I, you know, went to the gift shop. I got some nice Mexican tin crosses. I *heart* Mexican tin.
link | Comments []

[back to top]