Going Bridal
Bridezilla Confession Booth
bridal sins confessed

Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion
bad photos & bad dresses

don't let your guests stiff you!

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deeply bitter, but funny

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say it electronically

shut up about your fucking wedding
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t-shirts starting at $12.99
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Greedy Bride Store

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Martha Stuart's Excruciatingly Perfect Weddings
Best. Parody. Ever.





Saturday, July 27, 2002

Sara: Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion

Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion - because sometimes, I can't keep looking at wedding porn without asking what the designers and photographers are thinking. (sorry 'bout the hellishly long load time - I'm working on breaking the page up, but right now, I'm just so delighted with it, I'm posting it in it's seriously bloated form)
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Friday, July 26, 2002

Sara: Let Them Stab Cake

Ok, I've had requests for the recipe for the bleedycake, so here goes. Keep in mind this is my interpretation, since Leigh, Pastry Artist to the Stars, is still at Drinking Camp through the end of September and isn't here to comment.

The bleedycakes are wonderful. It's a heart-shaped layer cake, with pink frosting and frou-frou Valentine-y decorations, and it is served by hacking it in two with a cleaver. Raspberry syrup then seeps out of the wound, and, in the process gets into the chocolate cake and is quite tasty. The effect is lovely. Leigh worked through a couple of iterations on it; apparently, the key is that you have to frost the inside of the crater before you fill it with syrup, so the syrup can't just seep into the cake. That's how you get good bleed.

You just need a heart-shaped pan (or 2), a cake mix, a can of frosting (canned frosting is really good for the syrup barrier) and some raspberry syrup. Bake 2 heart-shaped layers, then hollow out the center of the bottom layer and frost the opening. Fill with syrup. Frost underside of top layer, plop it over the big lake of syrup, and then decorate and frost the cake. You can't really move the cake once it is hollowed out, so build it on whatever you'll be using to serve it. This should be a large plate, preferably white for maximum bleed effect. Something from Goodwill with a stranger's name and wedding date etched on it would be a nice touch, though.

To serve, hand a cleaver to the wronged party. Let her go at it. A hack-and-separate move is most effective. Then, pile all the scooped-out cake back on the plate, and start eating. You can use individual plates, but I think a many forks/one plate approach is best.
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Thursday, July 25, 2002

Sara: Now I'm really looking forward to the joint checking account

Simpsons Checks!

We will absolutely have to order these when we get our joint account. Which isn't to say that I even use paper checks anymore. I'm down to only a few left with my current name & address on them, but, through the magic of paypal, check cards, and online banking, I think I use 1 check a month, and then only because my hair stylist and my dr. don't take Visa. So, I'm not ordering new checks until post-wedding.

I've heard that the new issue of ReadyMade magazine is on the shelves, but my subscription issue has yet to arrive in my mailbox. I'm hoping it shows up soon, as it will be a lovely treat. I should think of projects to contribute. Leigh should send them her heart-shaped bleedycake. It's the perfect dessert for your Relationship Wake, Anti-Valentine Party, or other festive event. It's served with a cleaver, and if you have good technique like I do, the blood (ok, it's raspberry syrup) oooozes out in a very creepy manner. Leigh is the goddess of all that is cake.

Tomorrow afternoon, Ryan and I are going to the Gilroy Garlic Festival to embrace our inner garlic princesses, and sell CDs at the Hookslide show there.
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Wednesday, July 24, 2002

Sara: Tulle for Brains

I didn't invent that phrase, but I absolutely love it and will continue to use it until I'm slapped with a lawsuit. Tulle for brains!

I got a very sweet email from my sister-in-law yesterday; she has officially released me from Halloween Costume Duty. See, every year I go a little nuts and make costumes for my nieces. Last year, it was two princesses and a monkey, and a few years before that was the faeries. Which are maybe a little, you know, over the top. Does a pre-schooler need hand-beaded wings? Um, maybe not. But I certainly had fun making them.

Still, in this Year of Living Bridally, the idea of crossing three sewing projects off my list is appealing. They can have fabulous costumes next year, and, before that, I will make them pretty foofy dresses for the wedding. Maybe MacKenzie can wear the Spider Princess costume this year if it's still around and not trashed. I'm trying really hard to be okay with this, but it still feels like an abdication of a sacred duty. I am Crazy Aunt Sara, costumer to the royal court of Princesses Sarah, MacKenzie, and Jadyn. Sigh. I am also very, very tired, and very, very behind on my corset sewing, which is delaying getting the rest of the dress started. This is the rational thing to do. Grumble. Don't like being rational.
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Sara: St. Bart

The new Archbishop of Canterbury is a Simpsons fan. That can only be good.

I was also really struck by this comment in the article:

Reverend Sir Professor Maurice Wiles, concurs: "I am a liberal. Rowan is more within the orthodox tradition but he has an understanding and respect for why we liberals say the sort of things we do. You never get the impression he's waiting till you've finished speaking to tell you why you're wrong; he's genuinely listening to make sure that he understands the argument."
Several mailing lists I'm on have recently experienced small melt-downs, and I think the blame can be laid on the fact that many of us really are just waiting till the other person is finished speaking so that we can tell them why they're wrong. I know I do this all the time. I'm very happy to have someone like Rowan Williams in the church. Maybe we'll all learn something from him.
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Tuesday, July 23, 2002

Sara: Make Your Own Head Decorations

Headband tutorial! Circlet head thingy tutorial!
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Sara: Dennis, I promise I won't do this

Surprise wedding. And I've been worried that I haven't involved the groom in planning enough. At least he knows he is getting married!

Oh no, there are new stories on Etiquette Hell. So much for getting anything done today!

Mr. Zippy Burgerbutt has written a fabulous review of the Robert Randolph show we went to a few weeks ago, and it's published on Jambase. Yay, Dennis!
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Monday, July 22, 2002

Dennis: Another Silly Name Generator

There's a wondrous good series of children's books called Captain Underpants and someone sent me a nifty name generator for your name in the Captain's universe. Mine is Zippy Burgerbutt. Go here to find your own super-duper underpantsy moniker ! By the way, Sara's is Loopy Giggletush. I took a minute to look it up for her :)
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