Going Bridal
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bridal sins confessed

Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion
bad photos & bad dresses

don't let your guests stiff you!

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deeply bitter, but funny

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Martha Stuart's Excruciatingly Perfect Weddings
Best. Parody. Ever.





Saturday, August 03, 2002

Sara: Hey! Crappy white shoes!

I went thrifting for a while this morning, in order to avoid cleaning my room, and noticed that my local Goodwill and Salvation Army, while devoid of fondue pots today, are chock-full of white bridesque shoes, which, surprise, appear to only have been worn once. If you're on a budget, $5 for wedding shoes seems like a fine deal. I saw a pair of super-lovely Kenneth Cole's for $8, but they were too small, grrrr. Goodwill also had lots of satin shoes in typical bridesmaid colors, obviously dyed to match some monstrosity. Those were around $3, so if you're participating in someone else's Special Daaaaaay and it's gonna require satin shoes, it might be worth swinging by your local second-hand emporium and seeing if someone else had your colors. If your dress is floor-length, who's gonna care if it's a little off - and like they ever get an exact match anyway.

I also missed Ryan a bunch, even though she's only been gone on vacation for about 12 hours - there was a beaded mermaid nightmare gown at the Salvation Army, in my size, AND I had my digital camera with me, but there was no one to take the photo if I put it on, so you all have to miss out on that vision. Sigh.
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Friday, August 02, 2002

Sara: Bad Bridal Fashion of Other Cultures

it's a Japanese Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion. Wow. Boggle. Click on the scary-shouldered bride to go there. Don't miss the colored gown section. You will know fear.
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Thursday, August 01, 2002

Sara: Yarn Abuse

Eeeek. 70s knit nightmares.

Ryan, I'll thank you for sending me that link just as soon as I finish rinsing my brain out with bleach to get rid of the horrible images.

There's been some discussion about one of the dresses in the Cavalcade looking like a crochet toilet paper doll. Which makes me think that every bride (other than myself) should get one as a shower gift. Here are instructions. Spread the joy, won't you?
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Tuesday, July 30, 2002

Sara: Irredeemably comic

More from the new Archbishop of Canterbury: Most of us know that the whole business (of sexual intimacy) is irredeemably comic, surrounded by so many odd chances and so many opportunities for making a fool of yourself; plenty know that it is the place where they are liable to be most profoundly damaged or helpless. Culture in general and religion in particular have devoted enormous energy to the doomed task of getting it right.
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Sunday, July 28, 2002

Sara: Cavalcade updated

I broke up the Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion into several less-intense pages, so it's much more pleasant for dial-up users. Send me URLs if you see something that should be in there.

There are 2 things I would really like to have but can't find. The first is a photo of the Miami Vice Tuxedo Collection. That was a very dark hour in menswear, and it should be there. The second is a photo of a St. Pucchi dress c. 1990-1994 - it was Pepto-pink and had a flurry of ruffles on the skirt, so the bride looked as though she was drowning in Pepto. If anyone can locate images of these things, I will be so grateful. The world must be warned about them. Email if ya got 'em.
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