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Bridezilla Confession Booth
bridal sins confessed

Cavalcade of Bad Bridal Fashion
bad photos & bad dresses

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don't let your guests stiff you!

Wedding Planner (evil)
deeply bitter, but funny

Bridezilla Shop
Anti-bride Gear

Shut Up, Bridezilla ecard
say it electronically


shut up about your fucking wedding
The Anti-Bride Store
t-shirts starting at $12.99
greedy bride
Greedy Bride Store

wedding shoes


Martha Stuart's Excruciatingly Perfect Weddings
Best. Parody. Ever.

 

 

 

 

Thursday, November 14, 2002

Sara: Utterly Fabulous Stuff to Buy


Naughty Secretary Club
. There is, I suppose, no naughty church secretary club. Perhaps I should start one.

Oh, and the new embroidery designs at Sublime Stitching are faaaab-u-lous! Must make atomic dishtowels. I wish she did machine embroidery designs, so I could cheat and just stitch 'em out on my Viking. Sara is a lazy creature.
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Wednesday, November 13, 2002

Sara: Another great idea from BrideAudit

I have another helpful money-making scheme, um, service for the busy, overburdened bride! ATM rentals!

BrideATM™ will bring a custom-decorated ATM to your reception site. Why should guests be caught empty-handed when it's time for the cash bar, or the dollar dance, or the wishing well? Having an ATM on-site is a thoughtful way to show your guests that you care about their comfort, and using one of our white-satin-and-pearls wedding ATMs shows that you are a classy bride. The transaction records even have your name and wedding date printed on the bottom, so it becomes a keepsake of your Special Day for each of your honored guests.

PLUS, a portion of the $4.00 fee on each transaction will go to the happy couple! That makes it fun for everyone!
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Sara: More tin!

I don't know if anyone else shares my enthusiasm for Mexican folk art, but I found another great site for this stuff - Tesoros. I'm embarrassed to admit that I found it via Bride's magazine (oh, the shame!) since they advocated using wedding milagros as favors. I shan't be doing that, but I do lust for many many objects on their site.

Who here is surprised that I haven't started working on my Virgin of Guadalupe kitchen curtains? Sigh.
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Sara: Another reason to be sad that things didn't work out between me and Dr. Evil.

I haven't talked about my server logs in a while, but I did just discover that I'm the top result if you type 'Sara Evil' into google.

Other amusing search queries from people who were probably very very disappointed:
martha stuart nude (I'm deeply afraid to know what you'd get if you spelled her name correctly - um, that's NOT a good thing)
wedding colors to coordinate with beige
and of course hundreds of searches for Wedding Porn and Bridal Porn

Also, the Jessica McClintock outlet really needs to get its own website. I'm getting a ton of traffic from people looking for it. It's in South San Francisco. On Forbes Street. The dressing room is communal and you should wear nice underwear. They have sparkly fabric cheap.
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Tuesday, November 12, 2002

Sara: Diet Coke on the Keyboard

I must stop trying to stealth-read Tomato Nation at work. Trying to cover up the guffawing while reading this piece on dating was a total failure.

I'm not sure I could do an advice column - I can't think of a time when someone has taken my advice and been happy about it later.
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Sunday, November 10, 2002

Sara: Tiara day!

What, your calendar doesn't say that it's tiara day? Must be defective.

Dennis and I are meeting up with Ryan and Jon for brunch after church today, and then the guys are going into husband daycare and will go play with the TiVo or play video games or whatever, and Ryan and I are going to do the serious work of putting sparkly things on my head in various bridal emporiums. I'm taking the digital camera; if they let me take photos, I'll post 'em later.
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Sara: Tiara Shopping Results

Wow, I had a lot of things on my head today. Said very very often: "How is THAT $250?"

Here are the two I liked the best:



They're both twisted wire tiara/headband kind of things. Here, I'm wearing them more as headbands, which should work better with my hair down. The first one is at kind of a weird angle on my head in the photo. I like the green crystals in that one - I generally preferred headpieces that weren't made entirely of clear rhinestones or crystals, since it cuts down on the sparkle density. My head does not need to sparkle excessively. I also found that I like less-dense headpieces - these are both very open and air-y and that works for me.

Now I need to get some wire and some beads and start playing. I'm thinking clear crystals and green crystals and maybe some freshwater pearls. Although the second photo has rhinestones and that was kinda pretty too.
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